tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post3355223707174468236..comments2023-10-31T06:32:05.082-05:00Comments on Biblical Manhood: The Delay of Marriage (Men Are Not the Problem)Anakin Niceguyhttp://www.blogger.com/profile/09175647581810782580noreply@blogger.comBlogger93125tag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-68225588338701205422018-06-11T06:03:47.639-05:002018-06-11T06:03:47.639-05:00Useful blog post. Thanks for sharing....
Boon for ...Useful blog post. Thanks for sharing....<br /><a href="http://www.shirdipuram.org" rel="nofollow">Boon for childless couples in chennai</a>shirdipuram naanu babahttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09018781249413482696noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-59520491079227346272017-03-01T15:58:41.791-06:002017-03-01T15:58:41.791-06:00hey man, good post. I realize its old but its new ...hey man, good post. I realize its old but its new to me. I hear where you are coming from on this topic. I was brought up to believe that whenever a marriage failed it was because the husband didn't treat his wife right. I'm not divorced and i do have an awesome wife but looking around i see lots of messed up girls. There is more than enough blame to go around for failed marriages and it most certainly is not always the husbands fault. I also see lots of people delaying marriage and what you are saying makes alot of sense. I work with young single men in a ministry i have been given. They have many challenges to face and finding a wife is one of them.Brian Taylorhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/17612188729278138825noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-33629096595161690892010-10-15T10:13:12.412-05:002010-10-15T10:13:12.412-05:00A word to those women: If you are the woman that i...A word to those women: If you are the woman that is described by this author, repent. And we all are guilty of it- from not allowing yourself to see your own imperfections (Matthew 7:3), to expecting more than you are willing to have expected of you. Wherever your sin lies- repent.<br /><br />Now, a word to those who feel that good Christian men are still not excused from doing their part- you would also be correct according to this female-commentator. You see, despite the imperfections of women (so ungracefully pointed out here- none the less accurate in most), and despite any media pressures (to either gender), we are expected to move forward with faith.<br /><br />Yes, a man should still ask a girl out (hopefully he'll be kind enough to ask the girl which will give him a chance and despite hoping to be seen as a princess knows her faults). And yes, a girl should give a guy a real chance.<br /><br />If a woman takes advantage of the type of good, Christian- trying to do his part- man, described in this blog post, she'll be no less accountable at the judgement bar than will the man who simply let fear override his faith.<br /><br />Faith my friends. Faith...<br /><br />Sincerely,<br />A girl who hopes to be seen as more than a feminist- because she would rather be in a kitchen, treasure her husband and live a happily ever after together, rather than as a 'single princess'.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-70371583877257236522010-06-29T05:05:16.172-05:002010-06-29T05:05:16.172-05:00Couples need to be able to first identify what the...Couples need to be able to first identify what the differences are in their marriage and find out what went wrong in their relationship.<a href="http://www.aacounseling.com" rel="nofollow">marriage counseling san diego</a> Most couples do not have the open environment that marriage counselors provide to encourage communication and discussion, so being able to see what is wrong and knowing what the conflicts are leads to couples realizing what they need to address. Many times, married couples will realize their problems can be easily fixed with one or two changes on their part.Melissaharonoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-56132414794875624702009-10-01T13:24:00.631-05:002009-10-01T13:24:00.631-05:00I wanted to give a huge THANK YOU to Anakin for hi...I wanted to give a huge THANK YOU to Anakin for his incredibly astute analysis of Generation X Women and the current marriage debacle. He absolutely hit the nail on the head! I heard a comedian some time ago compare marriage to a parachute. How many men would go skydiving if they knew their chute had a fifty percent chance of opening? Well, that's the current divorce rate, brothers! Bravo, Anakin!Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-81197650689256404072009-08-20T15:34:13.497-05:002009-08-20T15:34:13.497-05:00Josh says:
I am not "shamed" by what Moh...Josh says:<br /><em>I am not "shamed" by what Mohler says. Nothing he says seems unbiblical to me, perhaps you could point out specifically where he has erred. I find with most Christian leaders if you don't fit the target they probably aren't aiming for you. If you do fit the target, I don't remember Mohler saying anything particularly shaming, perhaps a little stark, but not shaming. And I can certainly say that it was not meant as shaming, but as rebuking.<br /></em><br /><br />I'll let Anakin do that. He's got quite a voluminous collection of such snafus here. Adam (PuritanCalvinist) can also illumine you on this.<br /><br />Quite frankly, I don't have time.<br /><br /><em>Furthermore, biblical masculinity always asks "what am I doing?" first. This doesn't seem to be the attitude here.</em><br /><br />First off, I never left the Church...I've been involved for many years. And for most of the last 15 years it was in the Louisville area. I served in teaching roles that extended from children to adults. A sideliner I was/am not. I am currently involved in a church in central Kentucky.<br /><br />Nor was I particularly passive in those years, as I did my share of pursuing the women who were in my path. Those did not work out. I tried online services. Those did not work. Some shot me down; others I shot down.<br /><br />In many cases, I was left with a dilemma: stay at the church where I was serving, or bolt and go somewhere else, and take months and years to re-establish myself.<br /><br />Like I said, I'm engaged. I've found a mate. It took longer than I wanted or would have planned, and I had to do this from a longer distance than would have been ideal, but I'm not complaining.<br /><br />As for Mohler, he tends to provide simplistic answers--blaming single men for the protracted singleness dilemma--when in fact there are a number of contributory factors, some of which are very real and substantial. <br /><br />Some of those are on the Church (as I've pointed out), some are on the men, some are even on the women, and a heck of a lot of those are due to social factors for which none of us asked.<br /><br />He never mentions any of those matters, but sure levels the boom on the single men. <br /><br />If he really believes this, then he needs to get with the singles leaders in his own church, and start calling them to don sackloth and ashes. <br /><br />Either that, or he needs to admit that the problem more complex than the pat answers that he has offered on this matter.Amir Larijanihttp://www.singlemind.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-57515399680071551852009-08-20T15:00:08.129-05:002009-08-20T15:00:08.129-05:00Perhaps Mohler does not deal with the women and th...Perhaps Mohler does not deal with the women and their biblical roles because he feels his wife is already doing a good job of this through writing and ministering. Perhaps he feels, rightly, that it is the job of older women--not young men--to teach women how to be godly. <br />I am not "shamed" by what Mohler says. Nothing he says seems unbiblical to me, perhaps you could point out specifically where he has erred. I find with most Christian leaders if you don't fit the target they probably aren't aiming for you. If you do fit the target, I don't remember Mohler saying anything particularly shaming, perhaps a little stark, but not shaming. And I can certainly say that it was not meant as shaming, but as rebuking.<br /><br />Oddly enough, for all there talk about shaming, it seems that many of the comments here are meant to do just that.<br /><br />Furthermore, biblical masculinity always asks "what am I doing?" first. This doesn't seem to be the attitude here.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-3402018419406321972009-08-20T14:04:56.334-05:002009-08-20T14:04:56.334-05:00Josh says: Not every man will find a wife, atleast...Josh says: <em>Not every man will find a wife, atleast not quickly, but that doesn't mean that they can blame others.</em><br /><br />Nor does it mean that church leaders--like Mohler--should just shame the single men, when in fact those men are getting pigeonholed by the "leaders" at the very church at which he serves as the "teaching pastor." <br /><br />Maybe he can follow the advice Jesus offered: "Physician, heal thyself." Maybe when he starts addressing the problems in his own church, then he will begin to have the credibility to deal with what is going on in the larger Church community.<br /><br /><em>Should church leaders talk about this more? Yes. Are women admonished to seek proper roles outside of a (comparatively)few solid churches? Not really.</em><br /><br />And that lack of admonishment has a tendency to impact the women who are marriageable. In this case, it's clearly a sin of omission.<br /><br /><em>Are men treated unfairly in the culture at large? Often yes. Does that get men off the hook for their failures, general lack of presence in culture, church, family, etc? Absolutely not!</em><br /><br />That isn't the issue; fact is, it's Mohler who is blaming the single men for all these women being out there who long to marry, but aren't getting finding a man. <br /><br />In fact, what we have established here is that the church leadership--and at Mohler's very church no less--is an integral part of the problem. <br /><br />If single men are getting shuttled into a "singles ministry", and single women are settling in classes with couples and older ladies, then it seems that the church is setting these ladies and gentlemen up for failure, or at least aren't thinking with respect to their success. Without a network, you will have two sets of people who may never know the other exists.<br /><br />And yet, Mohler is pontificating without having a fundamental understanding of what is going on in his own backyard.<br /><br />Mohler is a smart man who carries a lot of weight in his convention. In his church, he is E.F. Hutton. <br /><br />If he cracked the whip and said, "Dr. Ezell (the lead pastor at his church), we have a lot of women who wish to be married, and we have some men who are grumbling, because they don't know where these women are. Let's get our heads together and see how we can deal with the problem. Let's get some single men and women on our team and get a more equitable framework in place," chances are you could get a solution that would be modeled all over the country in large churches.<br /><br />If Jews can network people all over the globe, then Mohler and Ezell and like-minded pastors who supposedly care about all those women who want to get married, can help get Christians--in the same general vicinity--networked.<br /><br />As for me, I'm engaged. I never dropped out of the church. I simply moved on to another. If I had it my way, I would have been married many years ago. We don't always get the breaks we want in life, though. <br /><br />I just wish the Mohlers of the world would get a handle on what is really going on--and they could if they looked at their own congregations--before painting with their wide brushes.Amir Larijanihttp://www.singlemind.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-80692400377851573792009-08-20T12:25:04.367-05:002009-08-20T12:25:04.367-05:00In Louisville a good example is Clifton Heights Ba...In Louisville a good example is Clifton Heights Baptist Church. Tom Schreiner is the pastor there, and it is an excellent church.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-76567950187795840272009-08-20T12:23:56.809-05:002009-08-20T12:23:56.809-05:00I think you will find, as my jewish friend from co...I think you will find, as my jewish friend from college pointed out to me once, that the reason jews find spouses so easily is that they have older people in their community that they trust giving them guidance and suggestions. If a church forces you to join a singles ministry, I would get out of that church! <br /><br />Men and women are getting burned by the segregation of age and sex in churches. You don't need church leaders to fix the problem, you need to find a little old lady who know everything that goes on. Mow her lawn, help her out to her car, and ask her who are some godly young women worth pursuing. I won't say it works every time, but I'll be darned if it doesn't work alot.<br /><br />Community is absolutely necessary to finding a suitable mate. Now, I'll admit that there is plenty church leaders could do to de-segregate their churches and form community, and alot of churches fail at this, but there are also alot of churches doing it right.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-43589096930526755302009-08-20T12:09:04.903-05:002009-08-20T12:09:04.903-05:00Josh says: I appreciate you bringing up a very goo...Josh says: <em>I appreciate you bringing up a very good point. I have no doubt Mohler is uninvolved in "singles ministry" at his church. And I agree, godly men in singles ministries are not likely to find the kind of women that are marriage material. Godly women have a natural (and good) tendency to latch onto older women to learn from and help them grow. Young men are wise to do the same. Godly young men need to get out of singles ministries and join churches with solid community across the age barrier. That is where relationships are formed.</em><br /><br />Here's the problem... <br /><br />If I join a church--such as Al Mohler's church, which is one of the largest churches in Kentucky--they are going to have me fill out a card. I will likely check that I am single and never-married. (I did.)<br /><br />They will proceed to stick me into the "singles ministry", which--as I pointed out--has a dearth of marriageable women.<br /><br />Now let's assume we have a few ladies in that church, who are in ABF class #1 and ABF Class #2, which might meet at different times, and perhaps on different campuses at that church.<br /><br />How do you get those ladies in touch with the men who got pigeonholed into the "singles ministry"?<br /><br />Answer: YOU NEED A NETWORK!<br /><br />Jews know this: this is why, in spite of myriads of challenges over the centuries, they have a knack for getting people together, sometimes traversing geographic zones. They are not the most resilient people in the world by accident. They know how to NETWORK!<br /><br />Instead of attacking the men, perhaps Mohler can exert some pressure on leaders at his church to help connect these single ladies--that are, for all intents and purposes, hidden from the single men--with the men who might otherwise make good husbands.<br /><br />The men are at that church, but are being pigeonholed. The men and the women are getting burned by this practice.Amir Larijanihttp://www.singlemind.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-4227021373142620872009-08-20T11:13:20.984-05:002009-08-20T11:13:20.984-05:00Amir-
I appreciate you bringing up a very good poi...Amir-<br />I appreciate you bringing up a very good point. I have no doubt Mohler is uninvolved in "singles ministry" at his church. And I agree, godly men in singles ministries are not likely to find the kind of women that are marriage material. Godly women have a natural (and good) tendency to latch onto older women to learn from and help them grow. Young men are wise to do the same. Godly young men need to get out of singles ministries and join churches with solid community across the age barrier. That is where relationships are formed. <br /><br />And as for knowing God fearing women who are looking for a godly man, I know a ton of them and I am meeting more everyday. What I don't have is a lot of godly men to send their way. <br /><br />A man who is earnestly looking for a wife that meets God's approval is seeking a good thing (Prov. 18.22). And we know that when we seek to obey God we are blessed. <br /><br />Not every man will find a wife, atleast not quickly, but that doesn't mean that they can blame others. Should church leaders talk about this more? Yes. Are women admonished to seek proper roles outside of a (comparatively)few solid churches? Not really. Are men treated unfairly in the culture at large? Often yes. Does that get men off the hook for their failures, general lack of presence in culture, church, family, etc? Absolutely not!<br /><br />Anakin-<br />I am not boasting, though I admit that it does sound that way, I was trying to be encouraging that to those who are earnestly looking in the right places, God does keep his promises and there are godly women to be found.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-80192542041838433422009-08-20T08:52:04.420-05:002009-08-20T08:52:04.420-05:00Anakin-
First of all, attending church may not be ...Anakin-<br />First of all, attending church may not be a sign of spiritual depth, but there are plenty of other venues in which women can be social. Why do they choose church? I agree that churches reach women much better than they do men, I just disagree with your view of what causes that failure. And I am willing to bet that with that many women in church, enough of them have spiritual depth to cover the godly men who are actually seeking marriage.<br /><br />Joel Osteen draws a crowd because he tells people what they want to hear, someone who draws people telling them what they don't want to hear? That's a bit unusual I would say.<br /><br />I am not familiar with Debbie Maken, but Albert Mohler is in general a very gracious person. The fact that he comes down hard on young men seems to me a witness to the fact that young men need to be taught discipline by older men. 1 Peter 5:5<br />And as far as the prophets, apostles, and Christ were frustrated I have 2 points. <br />The first is that they were acting on direct revelation from God-which you are not. And secondly, while I would agree that they burned with righteous anger-which was from God-they were not frustrated and did not lash out.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-38557899080197541372009-08-20T06:17:26.335-05:002009-08-20T06:17:26.335-05:00Josh: I have also met Al Mohler. There are many is...Josh: I have also met Al Mohler. There are many issues on which I agree with him. I was at Southern Seminary when he was inaugurated (1993). I can attest to the fact that he cleaned out the trash at Southern. And trust me, it needed cleaning.<br /><br />On the other hand, I was a member at Al Mohler's church for over 4 years. I was in the "singles ministry" at the "main campus" during that time. I can attest to (a) the men who were there and (b) the women who were there. <br /><br />I can also attest to the fact that Mohler never once stepped foot into that class during my 4 years, and therefore hasn't a clue what is going on in the singles department in his own church.<br /><br />Fact is, the marriageable single women were not in the "singles ministry", and the single men were effectively segregated from the ones who were marriageable. <br /><br />(By marriageable, I am referring to women in their 20s and 30s, never-married, aspire to marry, and are otherwise of sound mind. Those are the women whom folks in my age bracket are generally interested.)<br /><br />The women who were in the "singles ministry" were usually in their 50s or older and divorced. If you were a single man in your 20s or 30s--even your early 40s--you were not going to find a single woman (never-married and not already taken) in that class. <br /><br />No...almost all of those women were shuttled into other classes. Trouble is, unless you knew where to look, you weren't going to find them.<br /><br />Personally, I think that was by design: there has long been a "we don't run a dating service" mentality among many people in that church. Mohler didn't cause that problem--it existed long before any of the current ministry team got there.<br /><br />I saw the underpinnings of that in the "singles ministry": otherwise good teachers were unwittingly discouraging singles from getting together, although they never thought of it that way. Was that Mohler's fault? Of course not. I would even take it easy on the teachers, as they didn't realize what they were really doing. <br /><br />That culture existed long before Mohler ever got there. And it's not just at his church, either. It's prevalent in Baptist circles.<br /><br />Over in my blog space, we have had several regular respondents get married recently. I am engaged. Apart from that, several of my friends in real life have recently married.<br /><br />None of them met their mates at church. Almost all of them met their mates online. I met mine in the blogosphere. And we're talking Christians here.<br /><br />Why are so many Christian singles finding Christian mates in other venues besides the church?<br /><br />That's the problem that guys like Mohler need to start addressing. Yesterday.<br /><br />On a different note, if any Christian guys are looking, I have a number of single women who are regular respondents at my blog. They wish to marry, and have not had any interested parties in their local venues.<br /><br /> They are as far to the west as California and as far the north as Canada and as far to the east as DC. <br /><br />I have no financial interest in them getting married, but they would make otherwise good mates and are themselves frustrated at not having found men.<br /><br />And many of them are willing to travel...Amir Larijanihttp://www.singlemind.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-44054362643532564342009-08-19T22:11:34.939-05:002009-08-19T22:11:34.939-05:00To Josh Kreebs who writes:
Just thought I should ...To Josh Kreebs who writes:<br /><br /><i>Just thought I should mention that a recent study shows that on any given sunday there are 13 million more women in church then men.</i><br /><br />Women tend to be social creatures. Is church attendance a sign of theological depth? <br /><br /><i>Albert Mohler, who I have met, is actually bringing in record numbers of men. As are Robert Lewis, Vodie Baucham, and many others who you claim are shaming men.I have yet to see your theories actually work anywhere. What I have seen is thousands of men show up to hear Robert Lewis tell men that they need to step up and actually be men.</i><br /><br />Joel Osteen draws a crowd, too. What's your point?<br /><br /><i>Further, rebuking in love is always your biblical right, but rebuking out of frustration is a sin.</i><br /><br />I dunno. Albert Mohler seems like one frustrated fellow to me. I don't he could be much nastier in vilifying young men (e.g., "where are the MEEENNNN?") Debbie Maken even more so. Anyway, what do you do with the Old Testaments Prophets, the Apostles, and Christ himself? They were most certainly frustrated with people's stiff-necked attitude, just I am frustrated with the stiff-necked attitudes displayed by some about the issues I address. Maybe you need to understand the difference between being "nice" and being holy.<br /><br /><i>With 13 million more women in churches, making up 61%of attendence, I would say that we're talking planks and splinters. </i><br /><br />What does church attendance have to do with the inner heart and readiness to marry? Even homosexuals attend church.<br /><br /><i> I don't know any of your marital situations, but I had no trouble finding a godly women with reasonable expectations. I mean, there are about 13 million more of them than us, right? </i><br /><br />Let me see here. According to Prov. 19:14, a prudent wife is from the Lord. If your wife is from the Lord, then why do you boast as if you accomplished some virtuous thing? Again, if something is a gift from the Lord, then on what basis does a man boast? Is such boasting edifying and fruitful? I daresay there are men more godly than you that go without wives even as they seek them. Will you compare yourself to them before Lord with the attitude that you have in heart? When you boast in your possession of a wife before other men in order to shame them, what does that say about your counsel concerning biblical manhood?Anakin Niceguyhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/09175647581810782580noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-16403361958263305632009-08-19T18:58:32.631-05:002009-08-19T18:58:32.631-05:00What Josh said.What Josh said.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-76196515484970406132009-08-19T12:13:43.182-05:002009-08-19T12:13:43.182-05:00P.S. Feel free to view my post in partial response...P.S. Feel free to view my post in partial response to yours on my blog www.heroinstinct.com. I think that some of your other posts have been good, but on this one I have to disagree. Not with everything, but with the general attitude. Comments are welcome but profanity is not.Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-22400983119851924662009-08-19T12:11:42.326-05:002009-08-19T12:11:42.326-05:00Just thought I should mention that a recent study ...Just thought I should mention that a recent study shows that on any given sunday there are 13 million more women in church then men. <br /><br />Albert Mohler, who I have met, is actually bringing in record numbers of men. As are Robert Lewis, Vodie Baucham, and many others who you claim are shaming men. I have yet to see your theories actually work anywhere. What I have seen is thousands of men show up to hear Robert Lewis tell men that they need to step up and actually be men.<br />Further, rebuking in love is always your biblical right, but rebuking out of frustration is a sin. With 13 million more women in churches, making up 61%of attendence, I would say that we're talking planks and splinters. I don't know any of your marital situations, but I had no trouble finding a godly women with reasonable expectations. I mean, there are about 13 million more of them than us, right?Josh Krebshttps://www.blogger.com/profile/01992023202002896333noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-61534954760107677012009-08-18T15:07:08.395-05:002009-08-18T15:07:08.395-05:00Hey Anon, I do not think that kind of language is ...Hey Anon, I do not think that kind of language is appropriate here. Now I am nobody here, not even the bottle washer, but there is my opinion.<br /><br />TreyTMinkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07221261635305430323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-31854031911255454552009-08-18T10:07:59.655-05:002009-08-18T10:07:59.655-05:00Vysota is not a guy. Until I see a notarized state...Vysota is not a guy. Until I see a notarized statement saying otherwise, I'll believe it's a feminist cunt posing as a man. :)<br /><br />The shaming tactics are so overused, we should all know them by now. Anyone who doesn't agree with the feminist BS has: no girlfriend, a small penis, hidden hatred of women...<br /><br />Well guess what? None of the above, bitch!<br /><br />Threats and smear campaigns have been used for years by the feminist cunts to silence journalists, academics, writers and politicians. But it doesn't work on the web.<br /><br />Of course we all know about the marriage strike due to divorce, but I found that the implications of divorce spill over even into married couples. Just as the writer, I noticed that my married male coworkers, friends, cousins, neighbors are treated with (sometimes outrageous) disrespect! I think that it is a side-effect of the "nuclear option" that is divorce today: it gives women the upper-hand and the power to disrespect and abuse their husbands.Anonymousnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-91287596259582129182009-08-17T17:25:44.644-05:002009-08-17T17:25:44.644-05:00"A big part of it is the massive amount of sh..."A big part of it is the massive amount of shaming language vysota uses rather than actually addressing what Anakin wrote. Of course, that doesn't necessarily make vysota a woman. Vysota could just as easily be a mangina."<br /><br />Or a progressive.<br /><br />Shaming and ad hominum attacks are their stock and trade.<br /><br />TreyTMinkhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/07221261635305430323noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-47819705888891548422009-08-15T11:48:00.921-05:002009-08-15T11:48:00.921-05:00Slwerner says:
The real "problems" begi...Slwerner says: <em><br />The real "problems" begin to arise when womens flaws and even serious misbehaviors are no longer addressed (by the church, nor by other women), and misbehaving women are no longer corrected.</em><br /><br />Bingo. And that requires husbands and church leaders to show some stones.Amir Larijanihttp://www.singlemind.netnoreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-34359492073717447132009-08-14T15:06:20.589-05:002009-08-14T15:06:20.589-05:00Schumes - "We certainly at least SHARE the bl...Schumes - <i>"We certainly at least SHARE the blame!"</i><br /><br />While some Men's sites do tend to tilt towards blaming only women, I just don't see it here. <br /><br />What I see in the original post here is a refutation of those who would selectively blame men.<br /><br />I've heard a bit of locker room talk myself - but that sort of content is hardly limited to men talking about women. Men certainly have plenty of faults, but as you see Anakin pointing out here, so do women.<br /><br />The real "problems" begin to arise when womens flaws and even serious misbehaviors are no longer addressed (by the church, nor by other women), and misbehaving women are no longer corrected. <br /><br />You can do as some (here) do, and "poo-poo" such concerns as trivial, and not worth addressing, or attempt to shame men for bring up such issues; but, the net effect has become that men are becoming increasingly less inclined to want to ever marry. <br /><br />And, if you've kept up at all with what Anakin and others bring up, you will no doubt have noticed that the standard response to this growing concern has uniformly been to blame men, shame men, and try to cajole them into marrying - but never to address either the increased risks (selectively to men) of getting married, nor to challenge women to be more marriageable. <br /><br />It is this distinct hypocrisy that many of us to seek to address. We don't seek to excuse bad male behavior, but rather to apply the same "rules" to all.slwernerhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/13293327533235793560noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-64351618893049103162009-08-14T13:35:10.916-05:002009-08-14T13:35:10.916-05:00Fascinating stuff. Could it be, though, that you a...Fascinating stuff. Could it be, though, that you and your Boundless nemesis are not really that much in contrast? That the Fall has so distorted our views and practices of love and sexuality that both men and women are to blame? Not to mention the media and Satan and any other scapegoats we could throw into the mix? Yes, what you said about women and expectations are true. But I'm a 25-year old single Christian male who has spent much of my life in locker rooms, listening to male after male degrade and objectify women! We certainly at least SHARE the blame!Chris Schumerthhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03030980380211429576noreply@blogger.comtag:blogger.com,1999:blog-4423802276620945726.post-11708047028976656682009-08-14T12:53:28.964-05:002009-08-14T12:53:28.964-05:00I agree with what he said there, too, but would sl...I agree with what he said there, too, but would slant it slightly differently.<br /><br />Strict monogamy is not "natural", that's true. Pair bonds are natural, but cheating on pair bonds appears likely to be natural as well. The insistence on strict monogamy is the hallmark of marriage, and what distinguishes it from "natural" pair bonding.knightblasterhttps://www.blogger.com/profile/03042581488365314771noreply@blogger.com